Chapter Two: Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One…

AL and the guys walked into the bar. Wow, that sounded like the start of a bad joke. Nonetheless, the only one who’d elected to stay behind was Hooks. They’d get come to come eventually – unlike normal bars, the Inkwell welcomed pets and sentient animals as long as they were clean and well-behaved – but this night was about Erik. She had a tight grip on his hand and Data, Clark and Radu were bringing up the rear just in case he decided to make a run for it.

She was proud of him, though. He’d made it all the way here with only a few hesitating steps. He was dressed nicely, his wig was firmly in place and the mask was off. AL figured that asking him to keep both the wig and mask off at the same time would be too much even if he really did have almost a full head of hair under the thing, but whatever. At least she got him to leave the mask home.

As predicted, the place wasn’t that crowded due to it being early on a Monday night. Also as predicted, there were a few turned heads to see who had arrived, but nothing more than that. No one cared that one of the visitors had some scar tissue on his face. There were a few people scattered about that AL didn’t recognize and she scanned the faces until she found the ones she was looking for.

Two versions of Dr. Emmett Brown were at the pool table – the two vampire versions if the extra heartbeats and lack of thoughts projected from them were any indication – and another two were sitting at the bar. Two Martys were around the jukebox fighting over what song to play. One of the two Docs at the bar was quite obviously OckDoc due to the tentacles attached to and floating around him – and, actually, Verne and Albert were playing pool with the two VampDocs – and the other had to be the one now being called RiftDoc, a steampunk, clockwork version of the scientist V had thought up for a LiveJournal roll play. He was the only one AL didn’t recognize by sight or otherwise.

He was wearing an outfit reminiscent of her own Doc’s outfit in the alternate version of 1985 they’d come to refer as “Hell Valley” – many-pocketed cargo pants, bright patterned shirt and a long dark coat. Huh. Didn’t her alter ego mention V had a thing for Doc in a long coat? Granted, V had a thing for Doc period. AL couldn’t see the gears she was told he had underneath the coat, but she could certainly hear them.

She could hear his thoughts, too, which surprised her. She’d been told he was, essentially, a cyborg; like Data but not. She was unable to read Data’s mind since an android brain was far too complex a thing to deal with, yet she picked up RiftDoc’s surface thoughts quite easily. Strange. Unless he had an organic brain. She made a note to herself to ask.

As “Johnny B. Goode” started playing through the sound system and the Martys (AL now identified them as VampMarty and VultureMarty, the latter who was the Marty from OckDoc’s universe) started doing something involving music (AL wasn’t quite sure what from this angle), AL dragged Erik up to Ock-and-RiftDoc, the Tenth Doctor, Radu and Jack following. Data, Adam, Jamie and Jesse went to the poker table, Luke and AL’s Tommy headed for one dartboard and Clark and the Fifth, Eighth and Ninth Doctors went to the other.

“Hi, Doc,” said AL. “Hi, kids,” she added to the tentacles as they hugged her.

“Hello, Lisa,” they chorused, now able to speak for themselves thanks to AL herself talking OckDoc into making the modifications early for muse use (hey, his Marty got the wing harness early, so why not?), making Erik jump slightly, then Albert and Verne went back to their pool game, the VampDocs tossing AL and the others a wave.

“Doc, this is Radu and Erik.” AL said. “Guys, this is OckDoc and Jules, Verne, Albert and Tommy, over there is VampDoc and VampDoc2 and you…” She extended her hand to RiftDoc. “You must be RiftDoc.”

“Yes,” he said, shaking her hand. “Hello.”

His hand felt no different than any normal human’s, but that was nothing new to her. Data was the same way: organic “synthoskin” covering the android circuitry inside.

“I’ve heard a great deal about you,” said RiftDoc.

“I dread to think…”

“Nothing unpleasant, Lisa,” promised OckDoc, the tentacles buzzing their agreement.

“Right…” she said. “So, anyway, see? I told you no one cares what you look like. Look around. Things are different nowadays.”

She was calling attention to the fact that everyone there was more preoccupied with whatever they were doing to even cast a second glance at Erik…or anybody, for that matter. This place had seen stranger, AL was sure, even if one would limit it to just V’s corner of the spectrum with vampires, a cyborg (or two, if you included OckDoc in that category), mutants, Sparks and everyone else she had in that head of hers. When you factored in all the other fandoms that hung out here on a regular basis, someone with spiraled ears or scars on his face wouldn’t turn a head.

“It’s true,” said OckDoc. “Society has changed greatly over the years and, once they’re used to something, the staring tends to cease. I can’t tell you how many looks I drew after the accident with the kids, but once the general population had adapted to seeing us around town, even the press left us alone.”

“We still don’t understand why people are afraid of Father,” said Tommy (the tentacle, not the former Power Ranger).

“Or why they think he’s crazy,” added Jules.

AL seethed automatically. It was her natural reaction to the opinions of Hill Valley’s populace about Doc. “For the same reason Erik had to hide underground,” said AL bitterly. “Fear. The human race has this tendency to attack what it doesn’t understand and, frankly, I find it completely and totally uncalled for. Though you’d expect it in the time Erik lived in – the nineteenth century. But now? Jeez, just because someone’s a little eccentric…” She glanced in turn to all the Docs present. “Okay, a lot eccentric…doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t be treated with respect. And who gives a crap if they have four sentient tentacles welded to their back or gears sticking out of various joints…no reason to treat them like dirt.”

“Have we mentioned how much we really, really like you?” the tentacles chorused in unison, winding around her in a hug.

“Constantly,” AL said with a grin. “And I never get tired of hearing it. But what I’m saying makes sense if you think about it. Really, Doctor – ” The four incarnations looked her way. “I’ve no idea why you like humans so much. Honestly. I love you to death, you know I do, yet that’s one part of you I never understood, linked or not…this fascination with Earth and the human race.”

“May I remind you that many of your ‘guys’ are human?” OckDoc said casually.

“Yeah, but, you know what?” She raised her voice so all her guys could hear her. “How many of you did a minor freak out when you found out what I was?” Jesse, Tommy (AL’s, not the tentacle) and Adam raised their hands (as for the other humans in AL’s company, Luke and Jack frequently dealt with aliens on Tatooine and the fifty-first century, respectively, so her origins weren’t that much of a shock to them). “And when I got you to trust me?”

“Well, that’s obvious,” said Jesse.

“We fell in love,” concluded Adam.

“Exactly. So, Erik, sit down and relax and I will let go of your hand. Though if you make a break for the door, we’ll just drag you back.”

Ten, Radu and Jack all shifted down one seat so Erik could sit beside her. When he did, AL slowly let go of his hand. He looked uncomfortable, but he didn’t run.

“Good. Bartender, give him whatever he asks for. So, RiftDoc, why can I read your mind?” She had to know; the suspense was killing her.

He blinked. “I beg your pardon?”

“My alter ego told me you were, in essence, a cyborg. Now, Data’s an android and his mind is too complex for me to read. Why can I pick up your surface thoughts like any human?”

“Actually, I have an organic brain,” he answered. “The farthest Andrew got to was my jaw…”

AL almost winced at the mention of this “Andrew” character and the memories the name was stirring up for RiftDoc, so she allowed herself a brief Hah! I was right! and decided to change the subject. “Gotcha…so, Docs, tell Erik you don’t care what his face looks like, please.”

“In all honesty, Erik,” said OckDoc, “it isn’t all that severe. There are many people out there who experience much worse.”

“Yes,” he said, speaking for the first time since arriving, staring into the glass of water he’d been given. “That is what Lisa told me.”

“And she’s completely correct,” said RiftDoc.

“I’m curious, though, Lisa…” said OckDoc. “I thought Medicus could heal anything and everything?”

“Eh, well, he likes to say that and, normally, it’d be true. But, see, he told us that the scar tissue was a birth defect and that’s something he can’t fix especially so late in life. That’s why Blind Spot’s the way he is and will be as long as he lives…which, as you know, is a long time. And Ulan’s ear is another story…she has a mutation in her genes. That’s what caused the insect-like wings she’s got. That mutation rejects any attempt he makes to regenerate the cells in the ear she’s missing a chunk out of, so she’s kinda stuck, too. And Scar’s missing half his horn and half his magic, so that and the scar on his nose can’t be healed.”

RiftDoc look confused. “What are you talking about?”

“The unicorns on Alnilam,” said AL, then she blinked when she realized he had no idea. “They didn’t tell you? There are unicorns on my home planet, Alnilam. Ask OckDoc, he’s met ’em.” He nodded. “See? In fact…I heard through the grapevine that you can control the weather.”

“Well, currently it’s less about control and more about the weather responding to my emotional state, which, as I’ve found out, isn’t always desirable.”

“I can help you with that. One day when you’re free, pop by the house and I’ll introduce you to Tempest and Mistral. They can control the weather, too. Maybe they can give you some pointers.”

“I’d be very grateful.”

“No problemo. You guys help me chip away at the shell Erik’s got around him and I’ll help you with your problems.”

And so it was.

The End

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